plug o' the week - december 22-26, 2008.

plugsie plugsies!

it's christmahannakwanza!!!

woot!

also it's cold as testecles (read: testuhkleeze) outside.

and the snow. so much snow. who was that guy?

guy who decided to make snow: 'ahhh. condensation in below freezing temperatures.'

best friend: 'i like it. let's try and see what happens.'

fail.

anywho, there's christmas and presents and ham and family and friends and sleep. that makes up for a heckfire lots of things. mmm-hmm. and ham.

on to this week's plugs! don't soil yourself all that much.


film plug o' the week -


it's a wonderful life.
i know. i know. it's so old. and it's on tv like every 37 seconds. and your parents made you watch it as kids. and you hate black & white. and...wait. what is this? it's funny. and sad. and jimmy stewart is amazing. and there's actual heart in the story. and maybe, maybe, i've been depressed enough once or twice to think that maybe i shouldn't have been born. well, friend, this is the flick for you. it's good, wholesome christmas fun. and donna reed is in it. two very cool people. not to mention, that bert and ernie of seasme street were named after the mailman and the cop in this flick. it makes the cockles warm a little doesn't? mmmmm. christmas movie. also, there's an awesome saturday night clip somewhere in the world (and by 'somewhere in the world', i mean 'on this blog') where dana carvey does the alternate ending to this movie and kicks potter's tuchas. it's amazing. made me love the movie all over again.

music plug o' the week -


wintersong - sarah mclachlan.
i like it. it's christmasy. her voice is amazing. most of these could be in a film or tv show in the sad/lonely/slow motion/snowing-christmas-montage. not that film or tv would ever need to play with people's emotions like that. i'm just sayin', if it ever came to that, this album would work. can be enjoyed by a fire, in a car driving to see the fam, or hangin' out drinking wine. songs i enjoy are 'happy xmas (the war is over)', 'river', 'wintersong', 'i'll be home for christmas', 'have yourself a merry little christmas', and 'o little town of bethlehem.'


televsion plug o' the week -


ed.
i miss this show a million bajillion. it was so amazing. it was the show that basically opened my eyes to the non-laughtrack comedy/drama. it was so clever and funny and the $10 bets. good grief. and the mac kid always being foolish and ed feeling sorry for him. and the lawyer/bowling alley manager. genius. and good ol' carol vessey. the high school teacher that all of us younger single guys totally wanted to hang out with, like our names were edward j. stevens. luckily, nbc sucks gnats and has not put it on dvd for all of us folks to enjoy. what's even sadder is that amazon.com has a page already set up for the possibility of it ever being produced on dvd. sad. i guess that's my one christmas wish.


and there ya have it. the christmas plugs. you all enjoy yourselves the nesxt couple of weeks with the eating and gifts and merriment.

and naps.

mmmmmmmm.

groove.

it's a wonderful life: alternate ending.

plug o' the week - december 8-12, 2008.

i know. i missed a week. life is crazy. work is melting my face off with all of the things i'm doing. gosh. stop being so mean all the time. demandy pants. that's what i say.

also, who came up with this 'awake' jazz? that was a bad idea. seriously. why didn't i get to be in that meeting?

so i shall make up for the lack of plugs last week by doing a regular ol' fashioned plug this week.

carry on.


film plug o' the week -



a christmas story.
dude. it's christmas. so i had to put a christmas story on here. it is, in fact, about christmas. the frakkin' name of the movie has christmas in it. i would be foolish to not do this. am i right, or am i right? this is one of the greatest kids movies from the past. my little sister arielle used to watch it every day. she called it 'the boys'. i found that cute. but it's about this family from back in the day that really wants to rock the christmas spirit, even if it means losing an eye. watch out for any bb guns this year. don't lick any frozen poles. also, fragile is an italian word. fudge.


music plug o' the week -


all of the sudden i miss everyone - explosions in the sky.
mmmm. rock. with no words. some people refer to this as 'ambient rock.' that sounds so hippyish and floaty. if words were sung over it, i'm guessing the same people would just call it rock. to me it's instrumental rock. they rock and they play instruments. i don't feel like that's a big leap. this is wonderful music to listen to if you need to chill, or draw, or read and you want some mood music that isn't just white noise or ocean waves. and when i'm listening to music i don't always want singers to be making me listen to their words. i'm a little rebellious that way.


television plug o' the week -



bones.
i know. there's like 30 gabajillion crime dramas in the world. seriously. i'm scared of how many crime shows are in new york. do i really want to go there? hmmmm. bones makes the crime drama okay. that's what i think. i'm always impressed with the mix of humor and drama. i know the show is hella gory, but they always come up with interesting ways that people were knocked off. a lot of shows are big into having a new secretary or lawyer every episode if the people aren't main characters, but they use the same ones consistently. well played. also, i was a pretty big fan of buffy the vampire slayer when it was on the air and it's really awesome to see david boreanaz continue his career. he originally wasn't one of my favorite actors, but in this show he really comes through. i think he's a much better fbi agent than he was a vampire. word up.


so those are the plugs. that's what they are. enjoy if you want. hate if you must. party hardy this holiday season.

groove.

i walked on water. i can walk to the door.

i'd like to say i'd stop posting videos, but jesus wouldn't like it if i lied about that.

best church videos of all time.

somethin' strange on the ps3...er...xbox...er...ps2...

burn-e

giggle.

plug o' the week - november 17-21, 2008.

hella late.

my bad. it's totally a different week.

you're sad.

or maybe you don't even know or care.

in which case, it's right on time. word up.

mmm. turkey. or to the veggies out there, tofurkey. word. i'm an equal opportunity thanksgivinger.

on to the pluggie mcpluggerstons.

hence forth.

to wit.


film plug o' the week -



wall-e.
let's see. what has pixar done wrong? nothing. crackers! these cats are good. even cars was good, and it was about talking cars. i'm not saying it's my favorite of their films, but it's still good. this here movie, though, kinda blew my mind. it's so well done. i love the characters, and the story and the fact that fred willard is the only real person in the whole thing. genius. sure it's that old 'robot dude meets robot chick and falls in love, and sure she's hotter than he is and has better hardware and faster more updated software, but he's so cute and clever and saves the day' story. saving the day really works out for those robot dude's and their love lives. also, taking the soundtrack from hello, dolly and using it for the film was very cheeky. and then i wanted to dance. god bless you pixar, wherever you are.


music plug o' the week -



med sud i eyrum vid spilum endalaust - sigur røs.
ever since i first heard these guys my mind was a little blown away. they had a song on wes anderson's film the life aquatic with steve zissou and i really liked it, but i had no idea what it was. luckily the scerri brothers and josh honig where like, 'you've never heard of sigur røs?!?!' then they beat me about the skull, and when i came too, i realized that they were amazing. i've also had a chance to see them live twice. crazy spiritual experience. my faves off this album are 'inni mer syngur vitleysingur', 'vid spilum endalaust', 'festival', 'ara batur' and 'fljotavik'. if you don't understand most of these words, that's cool. they're from iceland. they have a different language.


television plug o' the week -


30 rock.
good ol' tina fey. she rocked some good weekend update back in the day. and then she decided to spread her wings and make one of the funniest shows on television. ever. anytime you can make alec baldwin a bad ass republican who cares only about money and is in love with a democrat under the table, that's okay in my book. if you can take tracey morgan's brush with the law and subsequent ankle bracelet and make it a running gag on your show, that is pretty super duper in the book. also when you can make a saying out of the word 'myurt', that's even more splendiferous in my book. crikey, that show makes me laugh aloud. last season when the cast was randomly singing 'midnight train to georiga' i know an angel got his wings.


those are all the plugs this here in week.

well, technically for last week. but don't tell anyone. that'd be embarassing.

i will leave on a wonderful little snippet of humor from tina fey and alec baldwin from 30 rock -

Jack: So what are you gonna do with your money? Put it into a 401K?

Liz: Yeah, I gotta get one of those.

Jack: What?! Where do you invest your money, Lemon?

Liz: I've got like twelve grand in checking.

Jack: Are you an immigrant?

groove.

and giggle.

seven directors that make me wonder how they're still able to get funding after all of their crappy projects.

what?

there are bad directors in the world?

you must be crazy. there's no such thing. people wouldn't let that happen. there's too much money at stake. millions and millions of dollars. seriously. production companies want to make good entertainment that uplifts and is well done. fans love movies. fans love good movies. fans love good movies directed by good directors. they wouldn't hire bad directors. it's not possible. your talk is crazy.

or is it?

maybe it's so un-crazy that it's blowing your mind.

word.

1. simon west.













infractions -

con air
the general's daughter
tomb raider

redemptions -

thus far, nothing comes to mind. he hasn't made a movie in awhile, but in imdb he's got a few on the way. sigh.


2. roland emmerich













infractions -

stargate
godzilla
the patriot
the day after tomorrow
10,000 bc

redemptions -

independence day was fun, but still poorly written and will smith being funny was the best highlight. but he can do that in any movie, and better. so even the redemption is kind of questionable. stargate became a pretty groovy tv show, but emmerich had nothing to do with that.


3. joel schumacher













infractions -

batman forever
batman & robin
8mm
bad company
phone booth
the number 23

redemptions -

falling down is okay. and he did the client and a time to kill, both of which are pretty good for crime-drama. people seem to like lost boys, even though i never really got into it. i don't really know of anyone who liked d.c. cab for real, but it's good to make fun of. oh, mr. t, and your cab driving shenanigans. hoo-ah. needless to say, his positives are greatly outweighed by his negatives. batman nipples anyone?


4. paul verhoeven













infractions -

showgirls
starship troopers
hollow man

redemptions -

again, not too many. robocop and total recall where cool when we were kids, but i've recently watched them in the last couple of years, and they're pretty cheesy. and not in the good way. the other way. the bad way. again, fun to laugh at. basic instinct i've never seen, but when the most praised part of a movie is sharon stone's you-know-what, it doesn't really sell it for me.


5. brian de palma













infractions -

scarface
mission: impossible
snake eyes
mission to mars
the black dahlia

redemptions -

the untouchables is probably this guy's best film in my opinion. but even then, he had kevin costner play the lead, and sean connery had the longest death scene ever. how does one get shot 84 times and survive for an hour while talking and writing? amazing.


6. james cameron













infractions -

the abyss
terminator 2
titanic

redemptions -

i really like aliens and true lies a lot. and i understand that special effects wouldn't be where they are today with out this guy. but man, anytime i hear him talk, he has a ridiculous ego, and he's really big into bad writing. titanic was soooo long and boring until the last hour when the ship actually started sinking and t2 is so not as cool as it used to be.


7. george lucas













infractions -

star wars iv - a new hope: special edition
star wars v - the empire strikes back: special edition
star wars vi - the return of the jedi: special edition
star wars i - the phantom menace
star wars ii - attack of the clones
star wars iii - revenge of the sith
indiana jones and the kingdom of the crystal skull

redemptions -

the original versions of the star wars movies. the three original indiana jones flicks. american graffiti. seriously, after indiana jones and the last crusade, he should have retired. i know he didn't actually direct any of the indiana jones movies, but his presence was felt. crackers!


i know a lot of you won't agree with how i feel, or maybe even care. but it is what it is. these guys are all pretty high profile, and the fact that they're able to make really bad movies and lots of people pay to go see them scares the poo out of me. couldn't their craziness be more useful on directing ron popiel infomercials?

plug o' the week - november 10-14 , 2008.

yay brits!

and that's not a reference to britney spears. it's not. even if you think it is. man. you're out of control with all of your thinking, and what not. gosh.

no. it's a reference to our cousins across the pond on the little island. they're always making some good music, film, and, yes, television.

in honor of quantum of solace opening today, this week's plugs are all britishly minded.

word.


film plug o' the week -


casino royale.
i loved sean connery. he was the best. no doubt in my mind. george lazenby, while no sean, was pretty awesome. he was definitely in one of the best bond movies of all time. then came roger moore. he reminds me a lot of adam west and william shatner. those three guys should be in a movie together. wow. and then timothy dalton. really? what were they thinking there. i mean, i remember not hating living daylights, but i also remember not really caring. and then there was poor pierce. pierce brosnan has always been one of my boys, but sadly, the writers and directors decided to suck a lot and make his bond cheesy with bad oneliners. luckily, 24 and the jason bourne series seemed to wake the bond people up. why not have a badass bond that actually got injured and couldn't make everything magically happen his way? daniel craig. god bless that guy. it made me a believer in what bond could be again. i think ian fleming is smiling somewhere.


music plug o' the week -



their satanic majestic request - the rolling stones.
these guys have always rocked my face off. even when i didn't know anything about them. when 'she's like a rainbow' was playing on the new imac ads 10 years ago, i instantly fell in love. i had to search hi and low for that noise. thank god i had a crazy roommate who loved them as well and had that song. he played it one day and i was like, 'what the whosits?!?! that's my jam!!!' it may not have actually completely gone down like that, but i'm taking artistic license. oddly enough, when i went to find the actual album this is on, i only know one other song. '2000 man.' another one of my favorite from them. i'm totally checking out this whole album later. you bet your sweet bippy.


television plug o' the week -


mi-5 aka spooks.
this is a good spy show. i mentioned 24 earlier. that to me is not that good. i mean, people are always hyped about it, but that seems so formulaic to me. like, jack is an agent. the world is in danger. every main character dies. except for jack. and there's a bomb. and there's a poison. and there's a mean boss. after the third season i was pretty done with that. now mi-5, which to our british bretheren and sisteren is referred to as spooks, is a frakkin' awesome show that deals with british spies. the characters are great. the story is always getting change ups. and the style is really amazing. the camera work is beautiful and the music score ever more delivers. the double edged sword with this show though, is that characters can be replaced, killed or disapear forever. what i like about that is that you never know who will make from episode to episode. what is sad about that is that characters i like are gone. but, that's not unlike life. so, i can live with that. word up. anyway, it's good, action packed, spy thriller, chocolate coated entertainment. enjoy.

clever plugs those.

chip chip. bravo. tea. biscuits. lad. cheerio. posh. football. by jove. chips. english jargon and the like.

plug o' the week - november 3-7, 2008

holy crackers!

another week already? what the snap is up with that?

this is why i'm tired. this week felt like two days. and then some.

oh. i'm also tired because i had to watch a three year old last night. it's not so much a physical tired as it is a mental tired. man. she made me feel foolish a great deal. sheesh.

anyway, enough of my old age and the greater intelligence of a three year old. on to the plugs. woot!


film plug o' the week -



young@heart.
so the girlfriend and i had been looking forward to this. it's a documentary on an older chorus from massachusetts who sings rock songs and pop songs. wow. this may have been one of the best documentaries and/or films i've seen this year. it was funny, heartfelt, sad and had some amazing music in it. i never knew coldplay could make me cry. and yes, i cried. i mean, not like sobbing tears and snot, but one little tear would drop out. somehow it'd find its way. stoopid tearducts. seriously though, if you like old people and good music, this is the film for you.


music plug o' the week -



way to normal - ben folds.
mmmmm. ben folds. what this man does with a piano is silly. he makes beautiful music and then sings about hookers, crazy people and throws in cursing randomly. obviously, if you're mad crazy against cursing, don't listen to him, but he does it in such a natural and undramatic way that it just seems to roll off the tongue. he doesn't seem to do it to be like, 'hey! i'm cursing! yay!' his fun songs are fun. his beautiful songs are beautiful. the songs i really dig from this new album are 'hiroshima', 'you don't know me', 'cologne', 'free coffee', and 'effington'. hehehheheh. effington. shooo.


television plug o' the week -


er.
this one is in honor of the passing of michael crichton who came up with this show. it's also in honor of the fact that this show has been on for frakkin' fifteen years. that's insane on all the levels. i'm not saying this show is still as great as it was back in the day, but i still find it entertaining. i've kinda watched it on and off since george clooney left. he was the big draw. we all know about that. but i always enjoyed noah wyle's 'carter' who i think is actually the main character of the show. it always followed him from day one. even though he hasn't really been around the last couple years, i'm excited that he's coming back to finish off the series. also, they brought john stamos on board. that man and his stoopid amazing hair. he pretty much looks like he did 20 years ago. how that's even fair, i'll never know. grr. that hair. fist shaking. so, rest in peace, michael crichton and thank you for the science and the fiction that you brought into the world, including jurassic park, the andromeda strain and the first great train robbery. rest in peace er. it's been a long road.


that thar be the end of the plugs for this week.

sorry for all the old talk.

happy november, yo.

groove.

aaaarrrrrrggggghhhhhh!!!!

new month alert. party hardy.

plug o' the week - october 27-31, 2008.

happy all hallow's eve! woot!

mmm.

candy.

clever that.

also, yay for plugs!

my first plug is for possibly the greatest halloween picture i have ever seen. more woot!



words can not express the happiness that brings me.

it reminds me of the old calvin and hobbes snowman pics. ahhhh. childhood.

now on to more important matters, like politics, religion and money.

oh man. did i get you. you were all like, 'whoza whatsits? what blog am i on now?' shoot. you so silly.


film plug o' the week -




ghostbusters.
if you're shocked, you're foolish. again, it's close to halloween. by 'close' i do mean 'is'. this has been one of my favorite films since i was a kid. i was over at christopher neyhart's house when i was like 7 or something, and his parents let him watch it, so i got to watch it. i don't think my parents would have, in a bajillion years, let that happen. but i prevailed. and i loved it. and then the geniuses behind it went and made an awesome cartoon as well. bless them all. i love the sarcasm and the wit. bill murray, man. he's okay in my book. as an actor. i hear he makes for a bad husband. but he tickles the funny bone. and egon yelling, 'your mother!!!' at walter peck will forever be one of my favorite moments in film history. there's also rumors that the writers behind the office are planning on writing a script for a third film. giggle!

'dogs and cats, living together. mass hysteria.'


music plug o' the week -



the things we do - angela mccluskey.
so i was watching a thing on the teevee, and a diaper commercial came on, and i was like, 'why does a diaper commercial have amy winehouse singing a song on here?' was i ever fooled. and had a little egg on my face. this was angela mccluskey. like amy winehouse, but scottish and not in rehab. her voice is amazing. and she's got the old 1940's feel that makes the music ears happy. i dig her a lot, and i think she's better than winehouse. definitely less trashy. definitely a good 'beer, sittin' on the porch, thinkin' about things' album.


television plug o' the week -



chuck.
yeah. i know. computer nerds hate this show because of all the lack of actual computer truthiness. and i know word nerds hate the word 'truthiness'. i've seen it. i know. but holy crap, is it funny. and that's what i enjoy. also there's adam baldwin. and after firefly, how can you not love this guy? i'm always a little confused by people who get so upset by shows that are pushing the reality limit. it's fiction. it can do that. it's supposed to be fun. it is. i've read things about the whole, 'how can he have a computer downloaded into his brain?' and 'why does the government only have one super computer instead of multiple?' you know most of these picky pants are the same people who love spider-man. (which i also do.) remember when spider-man was bitten by a radioactive spider and received the powers of a spider? that happens everyday. so that's why that's a good story. gosh. if you want some good clean funny with a dash of action, chuck is the non-computer geek for you. word up.


so there ya be. enjoy if you want. hate if you must. them's the plugs.

go getchyoself some candy.

groove.

crackers.

so.

i was going to post a blog last night about how i feel old, and how a lot of my friends (and sister) are married and a bunch are starting to have kids, and how, at my age now, my dad already had two kids and had been married for eight years, and that made me sad and i really thought a depressing blog would be...well...depressing.

but seriously. how the poo is it already november of the year 2008?

remember y2k? people were scared. they bought water, and bread, and guns, and moved into shelters. we should find those people and let them know 2008 is almost over. man. that'll be a good knee slapper. "hey, guy. you thought the world was ending. surprise!'

two weeks vacation. that would be nice. not in a bunker with water, and bread, and guns. for eight years. but two weeks. with naps. and comic books. and movies. and newcastle.

have you ever had one of those weeks? i feel like this week is one of those weeks. and it makes me tired. and i know. you're thinking to yourself, 'eddie, you're always tired.' by jove, that's the truth. but there's a tireder tired. and that's what i'm rockin' right now.

also, the use of the term 'crackers' comes from kristina, who always says 'crappers.' i swear though, every time she says it i think she's saying 'crackers.' so, i started saying, 'crackers.' it's fun. unless you're at a wedding full of black people. i guess. at least kristina didn't think it was funny. hahahhaha. that kinda made it more funny.

shoooo.

good times.

sorry about the boring blog post. it's possible i'm boring. that would lead to boringness being written. stoopid awake.

plug o' the week - october 20-24, 2008.

so. i have a blog. i do. i say that because i'm typing on one, and most likely you're reading it. i mean, if you're not, then you're probably not here any way so you don't know i have a blog. that's a large possibility. i also have a few other things. none of which really pertain to this blog, but this blog is not all i have. i am typing aimlessly. you actually don't have to read any of this.

anywho, so i thought to myself, 'self, what do you do when you have a blog?' it seems most people make lists and tell people what they like, and what's hip, and cool, and red all over. maybe not the red part, but it started sounding like one of those jokes. am i right or am i right?

so in the shower this very ante meridian, i decided i would do a weekly 'plug o' the week'. the 'o'' should be pronounced 'oh', not 'ah'. just to let you know. i will plug films, music and television shows that i personally enjoy, and think others might as well. if you don't like after reading it here, that's cool, and if you don't like before reading it here, that's also cool. these are just opinions and things i like.

also, i'd dislike any kinds of threats or anger from things i like even if they do suck a great deal.

also, also, if you disagree, you're a cotton headed ninny muggins.

that's not true. that was uncalled for. i apologize.


film plug o' the week -

shaun of the dead.
hecks yes i love this film. and since it's so close to halloween i thought i'd plug this bad boy. i mean, any film that has an electronics store manager drinking guinness and killing zombies is okay in my book. simon pegg and his cohorts are wonderful. they're also in charge of hot fuzz which blew my mind. it's funny, and scary, and hilarious, and they throw records at zombies. i mean. wow. genius. i recommend this to anyone who likes goodness. if you don't like goodness, go watch jurassic park 3.


music plug o' the week -


boxer - the national.
so, kristina and i were watching chuck the other night. that show rocks. i know mcg produces it, and he's a bit of a hack, but the characters are cool, it's frakkin' funny, and more often than not there are some good jams in there. in this one episode, chuck is rollin' up to his bodyguard/crush sarah's hotel room with a flower and some wine, and this song kicks in that's pretty slow, but has an awesome drum/rhythm thing going on. and i was definitely down. so the next morning i checked out adtunes, and low and behold, it was the national. i have a few songs from these cats, and they rock. i don't know a lot about them, but i know the lead singers voice is awesome, and the music is sweet. and they're from brooklyn. so i purchased the album. it's nice. one of my all time favorite things is when you hear a good song, and you're like, 'that's a good song. i wonder who does it.' then you do some sleuthing and it's from a band you already like. makes me think of rainbows, and gumdrops, and unicorns. word.


television plug o' the week -

pushing daisies.
mmmmmmmmmmmm. this show is so tasty. i can't get over how amazing it is all the time. it's funny and heartfelt and genius. the dialogue is super fast and the scenery is breathtaking. the characters, and even their names, are wonderful. names like charlotte 'chuck' charles, emerson cod, the darling mermaid darlings, and olive snook. also, on occasion, cast members randomly break out into song. woot! there are only geniuses involved with this show. sadly, besides kristina and myself, i think only three other people watch it, so there's a strong chance it'll get canceled. that makes me sad. thankfully wonderful shows like the poorly written, directed, acted, filmed and edited new knight rider are already being renewed. yay america! enjoy the amazingment that is pushing daisies before it is gone forever. mmm. pie.

so ends the first plug noise. let me know if you have thoughts and/or feelings.

groove.

supes n' bats.

i giggled. i won't lie.

more car chase craziness

i wasn't involved with the second half, but it seems like this guy is a crazy person. whatchya gonna do?

car chase craziness link

what the shart?!?!

so.

there was a fire drill. at work. remember those from when you were in school? remember the joy of getting out of class? and the being outside? it was a lot like that, except now i'm older and the getting up is more of a pain than the not working. not to mention that the fire alarm in our building is reminiscent of a banshee giving birth to a five year old cow with turrets. that's not as cool as it sounds. oh. it doesn't sound cool, you say? exactly. it's less cool than that.

well i decided that i'd boogy on down to jimmy john's and get my freaky fast on, cuz i was hungry. so after the alarm noise was done, i jumped in the ride and scooted. as i was heading down to the jj, a 5-0 rolled by with lights and sirens, and everyone pulled over. seemed pretty normal. cops on the prowl. right on.

i keep heading down plymouth road, and i'm about ten yards away from the nixon intersection when low and behold a crazy arse mofo rolls out of the intersection peeling out and leaving smoke and rubber all over the place. i was like, 'slow your roll.' he did not. as soon as that thought leapt from the brain, 5 of the ace's finest roll after him in high pursuit, again with lights and sirens. everyone in the intersection froze. we sat there for like an entire minute. we were all witness to a car chase. what the what?

here's a link - driver leads police in high speed chase

i get my jj. think that things like that whole car chase are mad crazy. i'm recovering.

i go to the intersection to go back to the office and stop at the light. as i'm waiting there, in the other direction, a lady is sitting at the other turn light waiting to go, but i guess she's too far back for the sensor to read her vehicle. the dude in the truck behind her gets out and starts yelling at her to move up so the light will change. then, instead of doing that, she just turns on the red.

craziest half hour i can remember in my life.

i was so too sober. sheesh.

five guys i think my girlfriend might be jealous of.

for all intents and purposes, let us suppose that i am terribly heterosexual and that i'm madly in love with my girlfriend. both of these statements are irrefutably true. it's true that they're true. believe me, for reals, yo. now, it's come to my attention, through said lovely girlfriend, that i may have an issue with mushes (male crushes). you say to yourself, 'how can that be? you say you are a heterosexual, and we've met your lovely girlfriend. she is lovely, and a girl, and your friend.' i know, right?

but whenever the any male below is mentioned, i guess my eye does something because she looks at me with raised brow and says ,'mmmmmmmmmmm-hmmmmm.'

seriously. it's not my fault. i don't think. i hope not. possibly it is. stupid guys with their hair and dashing good looks.




josh holloway.

he's sawyer. how can you not dig this cat? great hair. good teeth. and he's one rugged mutha'. the naughty monkey and i were so hoping he'd be gambit in anything. stupid hollywood and their stupid stupidness.








johnny depp.

well, he's johnny depp. funny. cheeky. bases pirates off of crazy old, possibly living dead, rock stars. genius, i say. also, the hair. hair is awesome. sigh.






nathan fillion.

the dude is witty. and charming. and also a sci-fi pirate. maybe pirates are really what i have an issue with here. hmmm. humorous, this fellow. very humorous.






john stamos.

this is kind of where it started. this dude always had awesome hair. and if you asked me twenty years ago who i looked up to in that department, this was the cat. oddly enough, it still is. and now he's going and getting all famous again. who saw that coming?







george clooney.





seriously. i think all of the above arguments are strong enough to stand on their own. am i proud? not usually. would it be awesome to sit down and have a pint with these fellows? hecks yes. and i'm pretty sure like 87% of you people out there would agree. just because i'm the only one putting this out there doesn't mean i'm the only one who knows this to be true. gosh.

also, i mentioned i'm madly in love with my girlfriend right?

it's possible i have issues.

ps - if my girlfriend, who might read this, doesn't really feel this way about these guys...then...uhm...nevermind. this post is only a joke. heh. man am i funny. with the guys. on the blog. here.

a couple things that would have made my spider-man film experience better

i know. it's a new movie post. you're saying, 'dude, why all the frakkin' movie posts? are you a nerd? do you wear glasses? do you have a superman t-shirt? do you know that bear mcreary scores battlestar galactica and replaced richard gibbs who did the original score for the mini-series?"

yes. yes i do. and yes i am. sigh.

judgie pantses.

so i have issues with movies, and i know that they're not going to be what i want them to be all the time. i get that. i don't even mind all that often that movies are different than their original books. i mean, the bourne trilogy is mad different than the books, and yet in my humble opinion, the best trilogy of films i've ever seen.

so why do i have issues with spider-man?

let me just preface this by saying that spider-man 2 is like one of my all time favorite flicks. it was pretty bad ass on all of the levels. and joel mchale was a bank manager. that's just wonderful. also, i had no issue with the actual changes to spider-man's physiology. the webs out of the wrists, i dug. even though technically it should have been out of the bootocks.

my problem with the trilogy has a lot more to do with their crazy casting and characters. i mean, kirsten dunst i've never really ever been a fan of. and i'm probably less of one now. i mean, mary jane? really? uhm, no. come on guys. if you're gonna use her, use her as gwen stacy. that was peter's actual girlfriend in highschool so i think that would have been a better use of her talent. not to mention, green goblin woulda done kilt her character off at the end of the first flick.

now, you say, who would play mary jane? why, bryce dallas howard, of course. she was so much cooler in every way in the third spider-man as gwen stacy. for reals. like, she wasn't used a lot, and her character was pointless, but i wanted more of her story and i really dug her charisma.

and i mean, kirsten dunst's hair is naturally blond, like gwen's, and bryce's is naturally red, like mj's. does this make too much sense? i think so.

as for tobey maguire, i don't really have anything against him, per se, but he's not terribly humorous. now, topher grace, who i know played venom, probably actually should have been peter parker. that cat is funnn-e. he's witty and his comic timing is spectacular. much like the friendly neighborhood web-head.

for spider-man 3, why so many of the bad guys? just make it about venom. sandman kind of actually did nothing. i mean the special effects were cute, but venom is too much of a big deal to make him the third bad guy. he needed to be center stage. as for casting venom, i would have loved to see that one bad actor. he's big and kind of awful, but i think he would have been imposing. ol' what's his name. right. karl urban.

that's about it as far as casting goes i think. everyone else was cast pretty flippin' well.

oh, the soundtracks were all pretty awful as well.

the score was hep, thanks to danny elfman, until sam raimi pissed him off and he left. man, the third score was pretty sad comparably.

luckily they're doing a fourth film which should be as exciting as superbabies: baby geniuses 2. mmm-hmm. that's the good stuff.

on a lighter note, i hear they're also doing a sequel for bull durham. yay!

sigh again.

nine things that could have made 'indiana jones and the kingdom of the crystal skull' amazing

1. there was no wonder. i seriously felt like indy was on a treasure hunt instead of learning about the history and being amazed by what he saw.
2. none of the ridiculous shout outs to the old films that were being made, including score pieces of the older films. why was the ark in that warehouse? why did he say, 'your grandpa is looking down and smiling'? seriously.
3. the fridge? really? wow.
4. why the crap was ray winstone in the movie? i'm pretty sure he added negative amounts of anything to it. 'oh, indy, i'm your oldest bestest bud that also betrays you. huzzah!'
5. swinging through the vines? dude. the crazy cg monkeys. so embarrassing. like, if shia had run through the forest at an angle to cut off the trucks and then grabbed one vine and swung across and kicked a dude, that woulda been hep.
6. was karen allen even in the movie?
7. the warehouse action sequence was by far the coolest part of the movie and should have happened later.
8. why did they show the aliens? keep some mystery and suspense. like alfred hitchcock with the important stuff happening off screen. you knew it was god that got rid of the germans in 'raiders of the lost ark' but you didn't have to actually see him.
9. the macguffin at the beginning should have had nothing to do with the rest of the film. that's how the movies always started. he was after something and then either got it or lost it and then it would segue into the actual film adventure.

i wanted this movie to melt my face off, and there were some scenes i really enjoyed. but over all, after it was over, i was like, 'sigh.' not to mention harrison ford hasn't done anything that's rocked my socks since 'the fugitive,' steven spielberg hasn't really done anything i've been excited about since 'saving private ryan' and george lucas...well, georgie boy, hasn't really impressed me since 'indiana jones and the last crusade.' but the flick did have the indiana jones theme, and that always makes me girly giggle.

hi dee ho

uhm.

so i have a blog now. this is me blogging. i'm not really sure what to say. i'm guessing i'm starting this now and will let it fall to the wayside and not actually ever write anything that means anything to anyone ever.

except this - don't burn peeps. they're scary and made out of 57% plastic. i'm guessing they're toxic. no one wants to get to heaven and be like, 'so i died by inhaling too much peep smoke.' it would be embarrassing.

trust me.

mmmmm. blog.

that is all.